Memories...
Tuesday, November 28, 2006
had my 1st paper todae..felt good bout it =) learnt my lesson from 2 sems ago, when i took this module call dynamics of inter-personal effectiveness..which was open book, so i yaya banana never study at all, haha then buang when i went into the exam hall n couldnt finish writing..so this time open book i prepared (tho for only 1 n a half days), knowing better of what to expect for open-book stuff.
Also got back an essay todae, politics of sea, got A-, which makes it easier for me to score in exams, coz the essay was worth 25%. The tutor who marked it was the one whom i mentioned last time as the fascinating guy haha. He put in his remarks that i was a do-er, and hope that i ll keep this spirit for the rest of my life. V encouraging indeed, but that got me thinking, what does he mean by a "do-er"?
Going for exams for the 5th time in nus is really different from going for it when i was a freshie. Hmm, i guess it makes one more relaxed, coz got more experience le, but i realize there still exist a significant difference between those going for honours year and those that intend to graduate after 3 years. Some of my year 3 peers who dun intend to go for honours are really quite relak haha, while those goin for honours apparently get more pressurized, coz we just need 1 module to cock up, and that ll affect our cap score. Speaking of which, by the time in yr 3, cap scores really quite hard to pull up or pull down le, and most people kena stuck in a fixed zone liao, esp after this sem. Of coz then there are also those crap modules taught craply, (like IPE heh) which can really make one feel xian.
Been seeing a lot of worried freshies..hmm..some tips for u if u re reading this now. Tips which have guided me thru out the past 2 n a half years, some of which i mentioned before le =>
(1) Study smart. No need to chunk down e whole coursepack and every single reading wan. No time. Pick out the main n most important issues and topics.
(2) Bring a personal alarm clock and a stopwatch to the exam hall (i m serious). Come on man, the exam hall clock everytime so far away how to see clearly? The stopwatch must time and press zun zun once the examiner says "go". Every second counts man, and seeing the seconds n minutes speed away can help to rush n poke yr backside to write faster also. Somemore ah, dun let the examiner cheat u of seconds by stopping the exam early!
(3) Time's up, Examiner announces "Stop writing, put down yr pen". Normally thats e 1st call, so do u stop writing? Of coz not la! Write somemore lah, dun care. Next he or she ll normally say "Any student caught continuing writing ll be disciplinary blah blah blah.." Take this time write somemore! Then comes the 3rd warning "I still see students writing blah blah".. Here comes the tricky part. If u sit far far behind in the exam hall, good for u. Very hard to catch u. Write somemore, n squeeze out whatever u can. If not, then yeah, stop and act pitiful if any invigilator niao u. Must always try to write out a conclusion at least, else yr essay ll look half-baked.
(4) Bring some giam1 sng1 ti1 (those kind of sour sour plum thingy) with u into the hall. I learnt this from last sem. The more sour the better. Coz can wake up yr idea wan, esp if u see the questions n get a mental block or scareded.
(5) This one always works for me. Whenever i m feeling shitty about revision, i tell myself "haha, prob hundreds of others re feeling as shitty as i am". That always makes me feel better. And come on la, nobody ever finishes studyin or reading everything. If we could, we wouldnt be in nus, wud be in havard or stanford loh.
(6) Ask for help from friends or seniors when u dun understand certain topics or concepts. Talk to them when ya feeling stressed. It always makes u feel better.
(7) There is only so much u can write in the exam due to time constraints. Thus, answer the question and go straight to the point. No time for writing grandmother stories. I always feel that having a strong argument and viewpoint helps too, coz it can help in makin yr essay stand out from the hundreds of scripts (who say the same thing as one another). Put yrself in the shoes of yr lecturer. If u mark everything the same u also feel xian rite.
(8) Play Kingdom of Loathing or some relaxing game everyday. And i mean everyday. Haha~ It can keep u sane.
(9) Dun be intimidated or scareded if u noe yr frens study much harder and much more than u. History has repeatedly shown that studying hard doesnt necessarily = to good results. (yes, the world is unfair).
(10) Finally, halo friend! you still got 5 more sems ahead of u leh!! now only 1st sem results buey3 zun4 wan! If u do badly this time round, always look ahead to the next one! And learn from yr studying mistakes.
Hmmm, these principles do work for me, hope that they can be of some help.
Last night when i was lying down on my bed, i suddenly thought of my old seniors when i was a freshie...people like Ken, Eunice, Arvin, Frances, shiqi, leonard, Ridhwan, Rudy, Patrick, Issac, Siling, joey, siang hou, kailing, meiyin, audrey, ginny, janiani, dennis, priscilla, kelvin si..even though i may not know all of them v well, i just rem that they were always around the clubroom..some always playing dai di and bridge haha..these was the generation before 25th took over..i dunno why i suddenly just thought of them..even missed them in a way haha..mayb it was coz of Ken's msg n well-wishes over msn..dawning on me how fast time flies..can still rem clearly him as my house ic haha..
I also tot of song kwang..haha! i miss him man..kwang ge..miss working with xuzi and chonghan as well in 25th haha..e 3 of us realli had so much fun and laughter and memories in 25th..i rem the daes of playing winning 11 in clubroom overnight! With steven as well ahha..then stupid soozie always use his dumb italy, while i always use lyon or newcastle haha..
also miss working with rayner boi n bobsie..e 3 of us complement each other really well haha, making up for what each other dun have, even tho half e time when we were working, we were always cracking our brains trying to solve problems..
I miss a lot of other people as well..haha..both past n present..
Yeah, and before i dozed off, i thought about rag 2006. Truly unforgettable wonderful memory..Sometimes i still go to bed at night thinking why e hell didnt we win, and what wud the scene have been like if we had won. And then i remember the bitterness n tears of everyone at the end, that i get so frustrated about it n stuff my pillow over my face.
Monday, November 27, 2006
Its quite interesting how certain people reacted after reading my previous blog entry. Some have agreed with me, while some were saying that i was too harsh on the new com and need to give them more time instead of comparing. When i heard these comments, i always smile to myself. n_n Some points i wish to clarify =>
1) 1st of all, people who noe me always know that i preached the value of "judge a com when it steps down, not when it just stepped up". My blog entry on 2nd Sept 2005 one year ago reads:
"sometimes i feel so lonely about re-running dear blog, esp when suzzi left..e rest of the 25th are able to sit around the clubroom table, talking about what they are going to do after they step down..suzzi going for dance and cheerleading, mary s goin for soccer training, chonghan will settle down more with shuyi, alex will continue intensively for dragonboat,yuimin s enjoyin hall life, steven and gang will have lotsa lotsa dota sessions, the list goes on and on...
but for me,i am going to re-run. And i feel that i m stuck in a zone in between the outgoing 25th and the incoming 26th, stepping down and feeling sad, yet stepping up again in a completely new com..
i feel touched and encouraged by all the people who asked me to run for president, every single one of them, who have the faith in me and believe in me..already criticisms have been struck at me, and i realize that i cannot possible please everyone in this world.. but as long as i know there are people out there who wants me to go for it and who believe in me, i will do my best for them. I cant let the new 26th down and i will not let Arts Club down. And if people ever wants to judge us, judge us when we step down next year, not when we are stepping up. Everyone needs a chance to learn and to shine when they are in a new job and position."
2) 2nd, I feel one of the best things in life is to see your successors do even better than you. Read October 13 2005:
"........
Disturbed.
Am i pushing too hard? Pushing too much?
Am i comparing too much between then and now? Past and present?
Am i being fair?
I always want the best for others...for successors..and nothing beats having successors outdo you..
Perhaps my expectations are too high?
No..
I dun think so....
Sigh..Its going to be 4 am soon.
Disturbed."
3) I wish to reiterate my point that when u decide to run for elections, and u promise something, you are obliged to fufill your promises. And when u choose to run for mc, u shud be putting in your best. October 6 2005:
"e past few days were quite fruitful for me in terms of getting to know all the various faculty presidents, Union pres, and NUSSU Exco. On Tues all of us presidents met up, and i m glad we all managed to get along well and had a lot of laughs..Danny e union pres is a very nice and warm person, and easy to talk to. I m glad, becoz i fufilled at this point of time, part of what i promised and set out to do during the internals elections:
Fostering closer ties and friendships whenever possible with 1)Deans Office, 2)OSA, 3)OED, 4)ADCC Presidents, 5)NUSSU, and all the 6)various Faculty Presidents.
With the end of the NUSSU appreciation dinner, I have completed part 5) and 6). At least for now, external relations between me and all the 6 areas have gotten off to a very good start, and i m glad about that, becoz i m positive it ll be good for the future of the club.
I m gradually easing into the presidential job, :) but i realized that it has taken a bit of toll on my personal life, and lifestyle as well..hmm, but like what i said and anticipated, when you decide to run for this position, you have to be prepared to give your all. If not, you shouldnt even be thinking of going for it in the first place. Sacrifices i make will never end for the year ahead, but i m positive that at the end of my term, everything would have been worth it. :) "
4) My PERSONAL blog represents my PERSONAL thoughts and views. You can choose to agree or disagree, and i never ask u to read in the 1st place (unless u re my friend). It also means that what i say may not always be or give the full picture, becoz i choose to place my random and disturbing thoughts which i wish to let off. And if u re a random reader secretly surfing here, let it be known to u that i ve no obligation to explain my PERSONAL thoughts to you, unless u take e initiative to talk to me about it. October 17 2005 (my bdae btw =p ):
"There are a lot of things which i wish to blog about..but ever since i stepped up, there have been countless times when i stare at my computer screen, dunno what to type about. Either that or after i typed everything, i erased everything again and told myself to forget it. Its not the past anymore when i could blog whatever tots that were in my mind. In fact, nowadays i always have to think twice before i blog..think about the consequences of how people might view my blog entry, becoz at the end of the day, what i write in my blog may only be certain tots but not the full picture of everything.
What i write in my blog will only be my side of the story and my thoughts, and in no way, representative of the MC or Arts Club. I just want to emphasize that."
5) Welcome to the real world, where it is impossible to please everyone, but that doesnt mean u stop trying or persistently saying things like "we have our own style what". Troy fell to the Greeks becoz their king kept saying "the sun-god will save us. We have our own way" instead of being humble, looking deep within themselves, re-examining Troy's strategies, and leading by example. Sept 27 2005:
"The past month has been..hmmmm..kinda hard to put down in words. Definitely a very tough period for me to go thru, but i m glad i made it, and pulled through. Been ridiculed, criticized, slammed, doubted, judged, disappointed, looked down upon, mocked (even by my own friends)..Certain lies said about me as well. On the other hand, was loved, appreciated, encouraged, supported, admired, congratulated as well...So u see, it was a see-saw of highs and lows during this period.
I truly learnt a lot from this one month. I felt that i have become stronger, and perhaps all presidents need to go thru this phase to toughen themselves up mentally and emotionally. I rem Steven had to go thru this period last year as well.
I learnt that (and i seriously mean it) it is impossible to please everyone, and impossible that everyone knows what you are thinking or yr intentions behind your actions. Why? Becoz there is only ONE me, and billions of other people in the world.
With respect to the previous point, I learnt also not to take what others say about me too personally. Granted, this is something which is not easy for me to change, but i feel i m making quite a headway in this aspect. Esp like what i mentioned, people may not see your good intentions. Had i took everything said or thrown at me during this elections period personally, I prob wud have crumbled.
I learnt that humans, being oh well, humans, tend to easily forget the good things that u have done in the past and concentrate on the bad. Was disappointed at times when the past year of sweat, effort, tears and everything that i put in seem to have been so conveniently forgotten by some people.
I learnt that people always wont see what you are PHYSICALLY doing as well. That is another tricky part of being a President..Becoz in reality, a lot of things which Presidents do are behind the scenes.
I learnt that Presidents have to make unpopular decisions at times, a job hazard which comes along. Sometimes presidents already forsee the difficulties or problems ahead, but it is not easy conveying that across to the respective com members. "
Finally, I love the club. I gave 2 years of my life to her. I see no point in enjoying the club sliding down after years of hard work put in by previous MCs (if it really does slide down), or criticizing others just for the sake of criticizing. I dun see my previous blog entry as defamatory or overly critical. Rather, like i said, i see it as feedback from someone who cares for the club (compared to those who dun even bother bout Arts Club), and who wish to add in some feedback and ask some questions of how the club can improve.
People who know me well knows that i m the kind of person who speaks my mind. Sometimes that offend people but whats e point of always mentioning the positive aspects and resting on one's laurels? I m not saying that one shud totally neglect the positive aspect of things, but rather, it is thru looking at negative areas where one can push himself and the people around him. Look at Sir Alex Ferguson, he has won so much and achieved great success over decades, but he mentioned himself that he is always looking foward to the future, and questioning where he can improve his team and Manchester United as a whole.
Having said so much, still, i very much appreciate you coming up to me and talking to me about this. You are entitled to your views, and i am entitled to mine, but it was great talking to u. I put up this blog entry to further elaborate on some areas which i might not have time to explain to u. All e best to yr exams, and take care. =)
Friday, November 24, 2006
I was just thinking to myself.. that its kinda disappointing to see neither the Welfare surveys and Dirty Laundry being held so far, nor the 1st issue of Insomniac. I always feel its important to actively seek feedback from the student population, even if their demands are unable to be met by the university administration, but that does not mean faculty clubs or NUSSU stop trying.
I rem last year's Dirty Laundry being a relative success (thanks to lace and bit) where we received numerous feedback, many of which i tried to bring it up to the administration. Issues such as students' claims for more water-coolers to be installed, library being too cold, extension of canteen hours during exam and study week, too many mosquitoes around study benches at night, crap lecturers, clamours for reinstallation of full recess week etc etc.. all surfaced during the Dirty Laundry. Of coz there were the usual criticisms of student clubs and the union as well, but at least, i take it optimistically as the fact that students even bothered to criticize, instead of just being indifferent.
I rem that the event received a lot of positive feedback, even from those who dunch noe the club at all. It ll be saddening to see this event go down the drain, as well as the Welfare surveys, after years in which a couple of past MCs didnt have the will to push them through. But of coz, there might always be better ways and avenues of seeking feedback, though i dun think putting a board outside the clubroom without any publicity at all wud work. And i was thinking of the dialogue sessions promised by those who were running for office during elections then, and still waiting.
There is also a reason why Insomniac's 1st issue is traditionally published in the 1st sem. Most Publications directors, writers, editors, layout artists dun have experience when they stepped up, and they need to learn fast becoz when the 2nd sem starts with another 3 issues coming, there isnt much time to learn. Put it in another way, the 1st issue gives more allowance for mistakes, and for Pub Directors to assess the quality of printing, writing, editing, and the ability of the Pub team and writers to meet deadlines. This will clearly improve the quality of future issues. As the age-old saying goes, practice makes perfect. Publications is an important component for any professional organization, and shud never be underestimated. But then again, perhaps coz Insom is going online, thats why there re delays i m not sure.
Studies may be important, but never lose focus of why u decide to run for office and Management Committee in the 1st place. Becoz if u do, u re doing a great disservice to your friends, to your faculty and to your student population, who entrusted their electoral votes and mandate in u.
**The views as expressed above are of the author's own as an individual, and in no way representative of any club or organization.
Thursday, November 23, 2006
I finally sent out my application form to participate as a Youth Ambassador for the Hongkong Exchange Program..haha, hope that i m accepted. Need a new challenge for myself. And i do wonder how many other Uni students send their applications at the time of their exams. If shortlisted, my interview wud be next week, right smack in the middle of my papers woohoo~.
I got to admit, International Political Economy is driving me nuts. So, upon much reflection, i did the next best thing that i could do. Decide to just study 5 topics out of 12, and go into exams with a bang! wooohoo~ Talk about entrepreuner spirit and the willingness to take risks haha..
Is charisma a natural entity or can be it be trained? Hmm..been thinking about it for a while..welcome any feedback on this yeah n_n
Friday, November 17, 2006
I am going Krabi with Princess Shuang Er after the exams!! yahoo!! hahaha..really happy.. n_n manz, its like years since i had a good o vacation bumming at a beach resort..ahah..ya la, couldnt go for a proper holidae coz i was so preoccupied with Arts Club stuff for the past 2 years..time to take a good break man! *grinz*
Krabi is in Thailand btw, and looks really great from all the pictures and recommendations online..haha, e best part is we oredi bought the air tickets, and booked the hotel resort there today le! yahoo!! =p Yah, and to add to more good news, Wei Quan was asking me todae whether wanna join him and the nus Rider's Club go riding together to Malacca..haha, so exciting man, one whole big group of bikers going together..i m quite sure it ll be fun, and def safer. I ve been to Malacca in the past before, and there's a lot of good food!! yummy.. *rubz stomach*
If i go Malacca rite, plus my reservist training, the SMUN preparations, and the Hongkong delegate thingy (if i m selected, hopefully), wah, it ll be a really packed holidaes for me..lots of things to look foward to and i m really glad! ^_^
On another note, i read on cnn that a few US soldiers had raped a 14year old Iraqi girl, killed her siblings and parents in their own house while the girl was being raped, and accused later on of even burning the raped victim's body to cover their crimes. It appears that some of them may have been drunk, but its horrendous what war can do to people isnt it...
A disturbing report indeed..I wonder how the Iraqi people will react if news of this atrocious incident get flamed up and spreads.
Wednesday, November 15, 2006
Read from my mail todae that the South West Community Development Council (CDC) is recruiting Youth Ambassadors as delegates for the Singapore - Hong Kong International Youth Exchange Programme (SHIYEP) II which is jointly organized by Hong Kong Home Affairs Bureau (HAB) and South West CDC...will be hosting them in Singapore in Dec, and then visiting Hongkong in Jan in return..
Should i apply??
Hell yeah I think i shud...opportunities like these are hard to come by...
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
In case some of u dunch noe, govt announced in Parliament today the raising of GST to 7%. Looks like what the Opposition mentioned during the campaigning period was right.
Moving to other areas, liverpool was totally hopeless on sundae night. I was hoping they might at least force a draw with the Gooners to dent their title hopes. But alas, i witnessed a slaughter that night. Liverpool played like pussies. Seriously, it doesnt matter whether Gerrard plays on the right, center, left, fullback or even goalkeeper! The fact that the media and everybody keep crucifying Benitez's decision of playing the incorrect role for Gerrard totally misses the whole point. Liverpool are awful as a team! And when u need to rely so much on 1 player, u have to ask what the hell is the rest of the liverpool team for.
Reina isnt as stable anymore. Hypia is aging and damn slow la! Manz he cant even catch up with kolo toure who scored! hahaha..liverpool needs a new strong centreback. And someone to replace Finnan as well. He's too easily beaten. Permant and Zenden are ok squad leaders, but they are not exactly 1st team material! And considering 1 is a Arsenal-reject while the latter a Chelsea-reject, nuff said. And upfront, liverpool lacks e cutting edge with only kuyt looking like a decent striker. Despite Crouch's goals, i never find him a man who bags crucial goals on the big Premership occasions, times when great strikers step foward. And he cant handle physical battles well. Toure had him for breakfast man.
But then again, thats e prob with liverpool isnt it. I ve watched the Premiership for 13 years now, and everyyear at the start of the season, the media and lotsa people ll always go "ooh liverpool got chance this year blah blah", but it has been the same old story for the past 13 years. Dun just talk about United, they cant even catch up with Arsenal and Chelski now. Hah, so much for big talk every year.
(P.S: If ya a liverpool fan, u shudnt be reading this, but then again, this is my blog and i dun really care how u feel)
Monday, November 13, 2006
Manz...some people just have no character, no values...open big mouth to talk and hao lian very good, but no balls deep inside..
This kind of people hor, must ma4 xing3 them sometimes to make them learn.
Came across this quote todae, which i think is nice.
"Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great."
- Mark Twain, 1835-1910
American humorist and writer
been really heartwarming the past few daes, reading emails from my 26th oac frenz..knowing how each of them are coping with life.. =)
been a delight to watch man utd as well..the team is playing really well at the moment in the league (minus e defeats to copehagen and southend)..its not just that we are top of the league, but also the way that united is playing..really breathtaking at times and i can feel the swagger from the old united back again..happy for saha and vidic too..after all the injuries that they had endured, finally they can get a sustained run in e team and re doing really well at the moment!
last weekend's spurs victory over chelsea was a great toast for me as well..i watched the entire match and yelled so loudly when dawson and lennon scored that i awoke my mum and my bro who were sleeping, for they thought something was wrong haha..plus the hammers win over arsenal yoohoo..shiok man..
watching arsenal vs liverpool now..enjoying both these 2 archenemies of united tearing each other apart heh..
i still have 1 more essay to go woohoo! And the toughest one yet..international political economy..i dun regret many things, but this is definitely 1 module which i regret taking man..shud have trusted my instincts back then in aug when i was deciding what ps mods to do.
Friday, November 10, 2006
Feeling refreshed after sleeping for 3 hours until midnight haha! Now to finish my 2nd last essay thru the night!
BUSINESS IS PICKING UP!!!
On a separate note, the Global Youth Symposium is postponed till May next year..quite xian when i heard about it, but on hindsight, maybe it ll be better coz i can concentrate on other stuff during that week in Dec..yupz..and thankfully, the conference doesnt clash with SMUN..just hope it doesnt affect my preparations for it though.
Wednesday, November 08, 2006
listening to the korean song "You Can't Say" now..very nice..
And also wang li hong's "Forever Love" ...2 very meaningful songs to me...
Tuesday, November 07, 2006
Been a painful last few daes for me.
Cant sleep well. Lots of thoughts. Wierd dreams.
Sunday, November 05, 2006
I haven't felt so angry for a long time.
In fact, i cant even rem clearly when was the last time i was so angry.
Thursday, November 02, 2006
As Political Science disciples, we tend to think (either consciously or sub-consciously) that we noe what is politics, or that we are so called the most "qualified" to talk about or analyze politics.
But are we really that good as what we think we are?
The problem i realize, from today's tutorial of Southeast Asian politics, (not a PS module), is that most Political Science majors look at politics with a pre-determined set of values, perceptions, theories, ideals, institutional arrangements, conditions, beliefs, knowledge... We look at politics in terms of issues, in terms of balance of power, in terms of structures, in terms of concepts, in terms of of policies, in terms of state of affairs...
We see an issue and we use what we have learnt previously from our political concepts, notions, models and institutions to seek and dissect the issue.
In other words, a lot of us make the mistake of seeing politics as a box. When we seek to open this box, we use what we noe best- a key, to unlock this box. We tend to forget that sometimes, we can use a hammer or an ET blade (learnt during army days) to smash the lock and open the box. This does not mean that we only know how to use a key. Notice that i use the word "sometimes" in my previous previous statement. Rather, what i mean is that we must rem to know how to use our hammer and ET blade when necessary, instead of permanently sticking to just a key.
Someone said this to me today, after the tutorial:
"Sorry to say this, but thats why i didn't major in Political Science".
That man is none other than my tutor, Mr Mohamad Arafat, and i ll really like to thank him for saying this to me. The way he has taught our tutorials is through looking at politics in terms of people.
Yes, people. Looking beyond the key to the box and at the hammer instead. Kinda akin to an anthropological approach to politics, but i really enjoyed it coz i really learnt a lot from him. I dun really thank much of my past tutors, but i went up to him just now after our last tutorial and really expressed my regards and appreciation for him. Turns out that he might just be a TA, but his approach and outlook had actually earned some recognition overseas as well.
And yup, he is the 1st person to ever tell me that statement i highlighted above. And i m positive i ll rem him for that. =)
